Episode 9

Can Men Experience Abuse Too?

Published on: 23rd April, 2022

If you are, or think you may be, experiencing abuse, click here in the US for help

If you are, or think you may be, experiencing abuse, click here in the UK for help

In this episode, Jackie interviews author and non-profit founder Lee Marks on his story and his path to becoming an author and an advocate for men who experience abuse.

Bio + Cool Quotes from this Episode's Guest:


Lee Marks is the founder of Break the Silence UK and began the organization following the release of “Break the Silence,“ his support guide for male victims of domestic abuse. This book is now used in a number of male domestic abuse services across the UK as well as being on the approved reading list for the domestic abuse diploma at his local university.

Following the success of this, Lee has gone on to write his first fiction novel “The Silent Truth,“ again based around a male victim of domestic abuse that has received very high praise indeed.

Lee is a qualified CBT and NLP therapist and is currently undertaking his Masters degree in Understanding Domestic and Sexual Violence.

“Has your partner ever portrayed any behavior that made you feel a bit uncomfortable? If so, let's talk about that.”

“What we hear all the time is domestic abuse is a gendered crime. It is not. Domestic abuse is a crime that can happen to anybody.”

“I'd like to say one day I'd fully recover, but I think domestic abuse changes you as a person. And I think that aspects of the way that it changes you, that you can't go back to how you were. And what you have to do, is you're recreating the best possible you, you can, from that situation that you've been in. And it's about having the right people around you that are going to support that process. Over 11 years since I came out of that relationship, and it's still an ongoing process, I'm still learning about me, I'm still learning about who I am.  I had to become a whole new person. I'm not the person I used to be.”

If you’re interested in working with Jackie or booking her to speak at your event, conference, school or company, click here to schedule a quick Connect Call via Calendly

For more information about your host, Jackie, copy and paste this link into your browser to check out her milkshake (Linktree alternative ;): msha.ke/jackiegraybill

Recommendations in the Episode:


Organizations

Break the Silence: The Organization Lee Founded

Video for Break the Silence UK

The Court Said UK


Books

Break the Silence: A Support Guide for Male Victims of Domestic Abuse (by Lee Marks)

The Silent Truth (by Lee Marks)

Until Death Do Us Part: Sequel to The Silent Truth (by Lee Marks)


Articles, Information and Legislation

Original Duluth Power and Control Wheel

Gender neutral version of the Power and Control Wheel

The Cycle of Abuse

Mary Wallstonecraft on equality

TED Talk on Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) 

Definition and Explanation of CAFCASS (Children and Family Court Advisory and Support Service)

Domestic Abuse Bill (UK)

The Tender Years Doctrine


TV Shows

Abused By My Girlfriend (documentary)


People Mentioned

Martin Lakeman: provided training for courts

Evan Stark: Father of the Coercive Control Movement


Events and Interviews

The International Coercive Control Conference

Lee’s Interview with Hidayat Live TV (Sky TV Channel 733)

Lee’s Interview on the Black Country Blokes Radio Show


*Books listed above may contain an affiliate link. There is no additional cost to you and I only endorse things I truly believe in.

Next Episode All Episodes Previous Episode

Listen for free

Show artwork for Abuse Isn't What You Think

About the Podcast

Abuse Isn't What You Think
Recognize. Escape. Heal.
Are you wondering if your toxic or dysfunctional relationship might be more, might be... Abusive? You're in the right place to find out!

Go on a journey from trauma to triumph with your host, Jackie Graybill. She escaped an abusive marriage and went on to earn her Masters in Understanding Domestic and Sexual Violence. Jackie takes all of her experiences and storytelling skills to bring you compelling, eye-opening and healing content with the guests she interviews and also in her solo episodes.

Have you ever been curious about EFT Tapping? Some episodes feature this healing modality. It's powerful, free and easy to do. You don't need any equipment other than your fingers and a quiet space.

Join this warm community and expand your education about abuse and abusers (often the people we love and care about), and why they strategically control and abuse us.

Are you ready to find out if, just maybe, Abuse Isn't What You Think?

Join the online Facebook group, Trauma to Triumph Sisterhood: https://www.facebook.com/groups/traumatotriumphsisterhoodchallenge/

Check out more from your podcast host, Jackie Graybill: https://msha.ke/jackiegraybill

About your host

Profile picture for JACKIE GRAYBILL

JACKIE GRAYBILL

With a unique background in music, communication and the arts, Seattle, Nashville and London based transformational keynote speaker/singer/songwriter/podcaster and author Jackie Graybill inspires and transforms her audiences.

Jackie has taught piano for the past 22 years, has lit up the stage in eight plays and musicals and placed in the Top 10 as Miss Puget Sound 2006 at Miss America’s Miss Washington Pageant. She has released two albums and multiple singles to Spotify success (as Jackie Gray). She is also a Toastmasters International Speech Contest Winner for District 9 in 2021.

Jackie’s colorful life came crashing down into darkness when she found herself in an abusive marriage. Now free, and an overcomer who holds a Masters in Understanding Domestic and Sexual Violence, Jackie combines her original music with a message of hope by helping others recognize, escape and heal from abusive relationships.

For more information, email booking.jackiespeaks@gmail.com or visit jackiegraybillspeaks.com.