Episode 6

How Can the Law Help Protect Victims of Abuse and Coercive Control?

Published on: 27th March, 2022

Join Jackie as she interviews special guest, NYU Professor Christine Cocchiola, who shares her own abuse journey and her fight to pass Jennifer’s Law (coercive control legislation) in the US state of Connecticut.

If you are, or think you may be, experiencing abuse, click here in the US for help

If you are, or think you may be, experiencing abuse, click here in the UK for help

Guest Bio and Cool Quotes in the Episode:

Christine Cocchiola, LCSW

NYU, DSW-c, 2022

Coercive Control Advocate, Researcher, Educator & Survivor

www.christinecocchiola.com

coercivecontrolisipv on Instagram & FB and coercivecontrol on Twitter

“Victims are highly agreeable and conscientious. They are off the charts in those two areas.” - Christine Cocchiola on study of shared victim traits by Sandra Brown

“One of the key characteristics [of abusers] is charming.” - Christine Cocchiola

“700 children have died since 2008 at the hands of an abuser, because a judge allowed the abuser to share custody.” - Christine Cocchiola

“Not all narcissists are pedophiles, but all pedophiles are narcissists” - Christine Cocchiola

“Coercive control is the foundation of domestic abuse.” - Christine Cocchiola

“At the moment we start to disengage [from the abuser], they actually intensify.” Christine Cocchiola

If you’re interested in working with Jackie or booking her to speak at your event, conference, school or company, click here to schedule a quick Connect Call via Calendly

For more information about your host, Jackie, copy and paste this link into your browser to check out her (Linktree alternative) Milkshake: msha.ke/jackiegraybill

Recommendations in the Episode:

YouTube Vids:

Dr. Grande on psychopathy (paying attention to Psychopath Factor 1 and Factor 2)

Dr. Ramani on manipulation tactics of narcissists

Dr. Ramani on scapegoating

Sandra L. Brown on specific temperament traits of those who get trapped in relationships with and by psychopaths

Studies and Articles:

Christine Cocchiola’s study: COVID-19 and Sheltering in Place: The Experiences of Coercive Control for College Students Returning Home

Baker and Ben-Ami study on Parental Alienation

Meier study on how women lose custody in drastically greater percentages when they allege domestic violence against their partners

False accusations occur 4% of the time

The Saunders study and judicial responsibility

Traits of narcissists

Michael Flood on Involving Men in Efforts to End Violence Against Women

Sandra L. Brown’s Safe Relationships Magazine

It takes 7 times, on average, to leave an abusive relationship for good

Podcasts:

Jess Hill’s The Trap

Crime Analyst, hosted by Laura Richards, featuring special guest Dr. Jessica Taylor: Episode 29: Who Framed Britney Spears?

The Rise and Fall of Mars Hill by Christianity Today

Movies:

Books:

See What You Made Me Do: Power, Control and Domestic Abuse by Jess Hill

Trauma and Recovery: The Aftermath of Violence--From Domestic Abuse to Political Terror by Judith Herman, M.D.

Talking to Strangers by Malcolm Gladwell

Not to People Like Us: Hidden Abuse In Upscale Marriages by Susan Weitzman

Dodging Energy Vampires: An Empath's Guide to Evading Relationships That Drain You and Restoring Your Health and Power by Christiane Northrup, M.D.

The Verbally Abusive Relationship: How to Recognize It and How to Respond by Patricia Evans:

Why Does He Do That: Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men by Lundy Bancroft

Coercive Control: How Men Entrap Women in Personal Life by Evan Stark

Social Media:

The Victim Advocacy Project

A Case For Ace

Peach Anjelica's TikTok Channel

Organizations:

Connecticut Protective Moms

VictimFocus, founded by Dr. Jessica Taylor

Custody Peace

Events:

The International Coercive Control Conference

Legislation:

Jennifer’s Law (the Connecticut legislation Christine Cocchiola helped pass)

Actress Evan Rachel Wood testifying to help pass Jennifer’s Law in Connecticut

The Safe Child Act

Kyra’s Law

Kayden’s Law

*Books listed above may contain an affiliate link. There is no additional cost to you and I only endorse things I truly believe in.

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About the Podcast

Abuse Isn't What You Think

Recognize. Escape. Heal.

Are you wondering if your toxic or dysfunctional relationship might be more, might be... Abusive? You're in the right place to find out!

Go on a journey from trauma to triumph with your host, Jackie Graybill. She escaped an abusive marriage and went on to earn her Masters in Understanding Domestic and Sexual Violence. Jackie takes all of her experiences and storytelling skills to bring you compelling, eye-opening and healing content with the guests she interviews and also in her solo episodes.

Have you ever been curious about EFT Tapping? Some episodes feature this healing modality. It's powerful, free and easy to do. You don't need any equipment other than your fingers and a quiet space.

Join this warm community and expand your education about abuse and abusers (often the people we love and care about), and why they strategically control and abuse us.

Are you ready to find out if, just maybe, Abuse Isn't What You Think?

Join the online Facebook group, Trauma to Triumph Sisterhood: https://www.facebook.com/groups/traumatotriumphsisterhoodchallenge/

Check out more from your podcast host, Jackie Graybill: https://msha.ke/jackiegraybill

About your host

JACKIE GRAYBILL

With a unique background in music, communication and the arts, Seattle, Nashville and London based transformational keynote speaker/singer/songwriter/podcaster and author Jackie Graybill inspires and transforms her audiences.

Jackie has taught piano for the past 22 years, has lit up the stage in eight plays and musicals and placed in the Top 10 as Miss Puget Sound 2006 at Miss America’s Miss Washington Pageant. She has released two albums and multiple singles to Spotify success (as Jackie Gray). She is also a Toastmasters International Speech Contest Winner for District 9 in 2021.

Jackie’s colorful life came crashing down into darkness when she found herself in an abusive marriage. Now free, and an overcomer who holds a Masters in Understanding Domestic and Sexual Violence, Jackie combines her original music with a message of hope by helping others recognize, escape and heal from abusive relationships.

For more information, email booking.jackiespeaks@gmail.com or visit jackiegraybillspeaks.com.